• Pages

  • About Desperate Exes
  • Meet John Nazarian
  • Share your story

• Blogroll

  • Nazarian & Associates
  • Rose Speaks
  • The Bald Truth: Art Harris
  • The Public Records Guy

• Categories

  • Celebrity Testimonials
  • Child Abduction
  • Custody
  • Divorce
  • Humor
  • Infidelity
  • John's Rate-a-Judge
  • John's Rate-a-Lawyer
  • Judges
  • Lawyers
  • Mail Call
  • Money
  • Moving On
  • Pellicano
  • private investigators
  • Public Speaking
  • Relationships
  • Revenge
  • Reviews
  • Security
  • Services
  • Terry Christensen Trial
  • The Hope Chest
  • Travel
  • Uncategorized

• Archives

  • January 2009
  • December 2008
  • November 2008
  • October 2008
  • September 2008
  • August 2008
  • July 2008
  • June 2008
  • May 2008
  • April 2008
  • March 2008
  • February 2008
  • January 2008
  • December 2007
  • November 2007
  • October 2007
• 
  

Happy New Year to all of you desperateexes.com readers and fans!  My New Year started out on a terrible tone as I had a terrible personal problem that I hope time will take care of…BUT, I did want to try and bring some new insight into the world of Family Law Judges, aka DIVORCE!

I spent January 2, 2009 in Department 6,  Commissioner Steff Padilla’s courtroom, from about 0830 hrs. to almost 1600 hrs.  Commissioner Padilla has to be one of the most compassionate bench officers I have seen in a very long time.  She has a style that comes across as someone you could just walk up to and share a coffee and a sandwich.  This judge knows her stuff and has all of the quick comebacks that come from meting out justice, and making decisions for people in the throes of divorce who cannot make them for themselves. One of her many quotes this morning was “this is how the cow ate the cabbage“…a comment also of just being a “southern girl.” Cows, cabbage, southern girl, welcome to department 6!

Another comment that she made to a couple before her was “if you don’t respect your parents, who do you respect?“…this was especially difficult for me to hear having just gone through one of the worst holiday seasons in my life.  Commissioner Padilla’s attention to what one side or the other wanted to tell her was a style that you seldom see in any courtroom in this country and she made it a point for those in front of her to speak and express themselves, BRAVO!  Another class act in a show where class seldom exists, Commissioner Padilla also reflects on her own parenting experiences and of her time as a criminal defense lawyer…she brings with her a great deal of baggage and all of it good!

Terror, Horror, Vengeful, Hate, Devious…these words are not strong enough to describe the act of Bruce Jeffrey Pardo.  This was a short term marriage and it is reported that Bruce was not exactly a ‘”stand up guy.” The story on how he handled his son who was injured in a pool accident does not describe to me a man with backbone.  On Christmas Eve he displayed behavior that would make one wonder why? why the little girl who just happened to answer the door? (he did find his mother in law, father in law and former wife as well as other members of her family, 9 killed in all).  How do you get over something like this?  For many who survived he also killed all their future Christmases, every Christmas Eve for the rest of their lives how can they forget?

Divorce is not designed to be easy, and certainly I am curious as to how Sylvia’s lawyer must be feeling.  There could just as easily have been a flaming law office as well as a flaming family residence.  Nazarian and Assoicates has been called out several times this year alone to secure and handle unhappy ex’s who were threatening lawyers, and they were all males. I have a method to deal with this issue and it is all nice and legal.  The lawyer is often looked upon as the bad guy, and why not? You married each other, and now it is going to be up to some poor lawyer to figure out how he or she is going to get you out of this mess, aka known as your wedding day.   Well,  Sylvia Pardo’s lawyer should be making big donations to his synagogue or church or whoever he prays to.

This is the second such story that I have discussed this year on DESPERATEEXES.COM, Pamela Fayed was just a few months ago and now this.   These are tough times for all kinds of people and none of us can ever know how close to the edge someone might be.  Even in serving a subpoena, I have always tried to be a gentleman and not a jerk.  Why, you ask? it was the same when I was a cop: don’t kick the bastard when he is down!  Give him a break.  If the individual getting the papers wants to be clown, well that too is fine.  It will never be myself or anyone who works for me to make someone feel worse than they already do in the process of serving papers.  Also I don’t want to get my ass kicked in serving someone papers either, so I try to be smart.

How the loss of the dog may have affected Mr. Pardo will never be known. How many times have I heard people say to me, “John, I want the dog”.  (It is reported that in Pardo’s case “his” beloved dog Saki was taken from him. Why?)  The dog does not even like my client, but one side or the other knows how the loss of that animal will devastate and sting the other. 99.9% of the time divorce is about hurting one party or the other and I often wonder why?  The lawyers and the judge involved in this case could never have guessed that a slaughter was coming based on their good work.

Funny how timing is everything, I was asked recently by a former client, “John, do you think Jason likes paying me $ 70,000 a month?”    If it was me,  I told her I would be hoping you would choke on a big chunk of ham.  And I would also be careful as to my water skiing in isolated places, damn boating accidents are terrible and tough to investigate.

Just a foot note as to how people think: My step mother was one of the nastiest, meanest-spirited people that ever lived on this planet.  She and her mother made my life a living hell for several years as a youngster. So what does she do 40 years later, she out-lives my father and  gives my father’s house to one of my furball scum relatives.  Well that scumbag almost choked the other day, on what you ask, a chunk of ham, during Christmas dinner, at his mother’s house! This for me would have been just perfect. I hope he eats ham every holiday!   Unfortunately they got the scumbag to a hospital…damn, I would have had a bladder full of urine for that wake!   My point in bringing this up is hate, the emotion, is there in all of us, and how each of us deal with it is what I guess makes us human.  And just as the hate that I have for the “scumbag,”  I can only feel that the hate and feelings of loss was thousands of times worse for Bruce Jeffrey Pardo. Something in this process that we call divorce unleashed that hate and he killed those that he felt that had done him wrong, as well as those who just happened to be around them.   We all have to keep in mind as we handle divorce cases that there are human consequences, and those consequences can be very deadly.

Strategy before a divorce filing and the days, weeks and months following that filing is beyond critical.  It should be the foundation of the case, along with having the right lawyer, whether a sole practitioner, a small firm or one of the major mega firms.   Oh please, I can hear it all now, “he’s no lawyer,” “what does he know”…you know what, I am convinced that I know more than many lawyers when it comes to strategizing.  Nazarian and Associates has been in the trenches for 18 years and I know the players in the LA area, including most of the judges.  No Law Degree some will say, very true,  but I do have a masters in bullshit detection and a doctorate in survival, and I promise I will guide you through all the steps.  Remember an old Nazarianism: playing fair will get your ass handed to you! Hmm, picture that over a glass of nice wine.

Nazarian and Associates will begin officially to offer services in strategizing your divorce in 2009.  It has become painfully obvious to me and my team that many people — including some of my own clients — are getting beat up by this process.  Getting beaten up is something that I am very sensitive to when I see it coming.   However, when I have been retained by a firm to assist with security or investigations, it is not my place to give advice as to what should happen or what is happening in terms of the family law process and court system.  I have to be careful what I say as to seeing and knowing what is coming.   The solution is for the client to retain us for providing strategy, so that we can give advice to the client as well as to the lawyers.  This will actually go hand in hand with the entire program of a divorce.

It is not easy for anyone about to go through this gauntlet, with their life hanging in the balance, and not sure what is about to happen.  Let me help you: it is all going to be bad, terrible…this is going to be worse than losing a loved one.  Please believe me that being nice and fair will not work out well for you.  This is a war!  And you need a captain at the helm of the S.S. Divorce who can see the rocks and the icebergs and pirates and cannon-fire ahead and steer you clear of them.

Why would any lawyer allow the other side in a divorce to get an upper hand?  It is tough for me to understand how any lawyer can just go forward without knowing the weak points of the other side, otherwise known as the Achilles heel.  For instance knowing things about the personalities of people who don’t want to talk about their personal lives.  One very good example was Oscar De La Hoya — he did not care what it cost him, he was not going to be testifying in any court, and in the end he did not.  He did the honorable thing and paid a fat sum to the mother of his daughter and pays for his child support of his daughter.  I can imagine people like judicial officers, politicians and celebrities as well as other high profile people who don’t want to publicly air their private lives…think about it!  Then you find the debauched rock star who “reinvents” his life, and through some clever lawyering sells it hook line and sinker to the court.   This guy and his lawyers have done a great job but it’s a con…who can change the direction of this ship when it has no rudder and is sailing into the rocks?  Me!  That is who is going to gain control and go full steam in reverse.

Knowing when to attack and when to back off is a talent often missed.  If things are going reasonably well why be a jerk?! Hey,  fast quarters are better than slow dollars.   When the other side is being difficult, you too should be even more so.   The bottom line is that a divorce is like fighting a war, you have generals, and captains and soldiers.  You will win some battles and you may also lose a few.  As long as you understand why you lost, that is very critical. And taking the appropriate position to not make the same mistake over and over again.   Not all the time is it the fault of your lawyer, sometimes the judge may just not like you. Maybe you dress like a hooker or you just don’t have the proper speaking tone or courtroom behavior. We can even fix this! First impressions are lasting in court and how you dress and address the judge is important.  The initial stages in court in front of the judge are critically important…you had better get a read on the situation real fast or you will be fighting an uphill battle of trying to regain credibility, and that can be tough.  Again, do some research on the judge, go to court and spend some time watching how other people in similar positions are either hanging themselves in his or her courtroom or are making headway.  Also, watch and see what pleases the judge and what their positions are on certain subjects.  You might learn to rethink your position or change in a way that will give you more credibility with this judge.  I have spent many hours in these very courtrooms and have learned the nuances of certain judges — priceless knowledge.

My point here is this, too many people don’t plan a strategy and do not pay attention to fees piling up, and then are pissed when suddenly they have spent $50,000 or more in legal fees and still have nothing much to show for it.  If you are feeling beat up…chances are you are. Don’t get me wrong, I am not advocating being cheap or looking for free services. All I am saying is planning a strategy is money and time well spent.

Nazarian and Associates will be marketing this service in the months to come…I have to say it, it is a brilliant idea.  This service is not for everyone; it is for high net value clients who want to come through the other end of the gauntlet with that high net value intact, and more. But you can be sure I will continue to share many ideas here at DesperateExes.com that will be helpful to ANYONE on the stormy seas of divorce.

Well, the day has come that many, including myself, have been waiting for. Judge Dale Fischer sentenced Anthony Pellicano to 180 months…15 birthdays.  Anthony will be 80 years old if and when he is released from the Bureau of Prisons, after which he will be on three years parole.  He will have to pay $ 7,800 to the court immediately (on top of the $2,000,000 forfeiture ruled last week). All fines were waived as the judge stated that he had no way to pay.

Kat Pellicano and her family came to the sentencing this afternoon and were looking great.  She was with her daughters and a young man.  Say what you will but this was her former husband’s doings, not hers and and not their children.  She has been through a great deal also,  the level of emotional pain for all involved in this case will never be measured. To some degree she, too, is a victim…however, she is going to be fine, I can tell.  Perhaps the show idea will work.  I would watch!   She and her family need a break.

Anthony came in doing the “stroll” as well as he could with leg irons and belly chain, with his hands cuffed at belt buckle level. He was as usual very happy with a big smile, and at times blew kisses to his family members.

Anthony had two attorneys present this afternoon, Steven Gruel and Michael Artan who did the old song and dance and tried to convince the judge that the probation department’s warm and cuddly recommendations should be followed. I.e. Anthony should be sent home with credit for time served and apologize to everyone and shake both Lally and Saunders hands and say “I am sorry” and give Stan Ornellas a kiss on the cheek and go have a Philly cheese steak sandwich. These probation evaluations are such a waste of time and money.  The prosecutors are going to have it “their way” and this judge is so far agreeing with what they ask for.  What a waste of time, it was so obvious to everyone that these two on again/off again defense lawyers were just putting us to sleep. But, they tried.  I noticed Gruel making his way to a short hispanic woman he called “Rita”.  Guess what, she was a juror.  And she wanted the court to show Anthony leniency and had sent e-mails to the judge.  Remember my piece on “peers”… this women was looking for something, what I don’t know.  I did see men in white jackets with nets roaming the parking lot…she looked and came across as a loon.

Lally was the first to speak and to address the arguments of the on again/off again defense team. He was right on the money! Then Saunders came up to bat and smacked all that legal mumbo jumbo right to the moon! His opening line was “hogwash” as to what he had heard from Pellicano’s on again/off again legal team. I am getting up in years, but I swear I heard a pig squealing.  These two guys are a team that are hard to beat!  The usual team of F.B.I. agents who had worked this case were present, and the man of the hour was none other than Stan Ornellas, F.B.I. retired.  Anita Busch thanked Stan as being there at her hour of need.  Stan looked great as he did the last time I saw him.  He had to be annoyed as to the exploits of Mark Rossini, Fired, F.B.I. agent.

Anita Busch was the first of the victims allowed to address the court and was in a great deal of pain due to an injury.  She spoke of the terror and the feelings being hopeless. She spoke of “death by a 1,000 cuts, deep and hard.” She spoke of the attempt by the L.A. Times to cover up the attack on her by Pellicano and Co.  The pain and passion as she spoke were very moving.  After she spoke she left the court.  Pamela Miller also spoke later in the afternoon and was very strong in what she had to say, and her East Coast accent  only added to her verbal attack on the Pelican.  All he could do was sit and listen.  Miller also made her contempt known for Greenscum and Bluster and all of the people who make it run. Pamela spoke of Pellicano’s “winning at any cost” and that Anthony had thrown away the act of being a son and a father to his family.   Miller did not hold any punches, nor did Anita and what they had to say was very moving.   I hope that both these women can put there lives together and move on.  They did not deserve any of this.   The usual attorneys were present, with dreams of home
additions and new cars dancing in their heads at the thoughts of what they are going to get from those who sanctioned Pellicano’s behavior.  The civil suits will be starting very soon.

Judge Dale Fischer has great timing. At one point Michael H. Artan is back up trying to salvage as much as he can and makes a comment to the effect of “who had the handle on the facts and issues” in reference to the sentencing guidelines. When Judge Fischer cranks off, “I have a better handle,”  Mr. Artan knew that his time had come to shut his piehole and sit down!

Two down and four to go.  Mark Arneson, the disgraced former L.A.P.D. Sgt will be coming up sometime in January, and I have to say that it is not looking good for him…15-17 years, I am sure Judge Fischer will have control of the “handle” that day too!

Someone kindly brought to my attention that I am not much of an “investigative reporter,” no shit!  The person who made that observation is also not a genius, so we will consider the source.  There are times that I can walk past a chicken farm and not find a feather, but I can certainly smell chicken shit and I know from where it comes.   And then out of no were,  comes a chicken feather and I am boating off the coast of Southern California, go figure.  On the other hand, do not ever underestimate me.   I am just an old-fashion gumshoe who is fortunate to be able to keep a roof over my head and provide for my kids…that is all.  And once in awhile if the stars are in alignment, I get myself a nugget! A little nugget that helps me go to the next level in my investigation, just a simple guy muddling through.  It was also the same through much of my life, much like many of my clients, “at the airport when my ship comes in”…but I work hard and try and get by.

While speaking to one of my friends the other day who is in similar work he said to me, “Have you wondered why NONE of the networks took on this Pellicano story?” “Hmmm,” I say.  I did wonder why there was minimal coverage from many of the rags and perhaps a little teeny piece here and there….cautious pieces.  SO cautious that the writer and the editor appeared to be “careful.”  Now my good friend Geraldo and his group are famous for taking a chicken shit story and making a dinner for six. Where were he and the rest of them? No place to be found.  Bigger names in the entertainment world could not be found than were involved in this trial. The heads of major entertainment studios, and billionaires, and famous people that many in American would love to have seen and read about, NOTHING!  Why was this the case?  Does Anthony Pellicano still intimidate from behind bars? I say yes sireeee, what he has in his head and in other places could scorch the earth beneath many a screen idol, and god only knows many a mogul. LMAO, can you imagine, these people think that this is all over!

“And why,” my friend asked me, “are they all scared shitless” as to what Anthony Pellicano has on all of them?  And as I have wondered many times, what’s “the big payoff?” The Big Payoff“ could be huge.  Let’s say maybe the government has their eye on someone BIG….or FAMOUS.  Anthony Pellicano knows it all and could it be possible that this will be his “get out of jail free card.” Uncle Sammy loves to make a deal when they want someone even bigger and more famous than Mr. Pellicano (Judge Fischer is going to make her point regardless, and it is going to be sharp).  Tomorrow morning, November 15, 2008 at 1:30 P.M. Anthony Pellicano will be sentenced, and I have had a great many laughs at his expense while he has been in this pickle he is in.  When you look at his family, you see what I feel are some very decent people.  There is no question in anyone’s mind Anthony was very clever and knew his stuff…“Anthony got results.“  Well, is this not a little like “Bernie“ and his 50 billion dollar swindle — 8% a year for many years and everyone knew that it was impossible to do that day in and day out!  Just as when
Anthony got busted those in the know were not surprised at all…for me I was sorry for him and told him so.  But surprised? not at all, I and perhaps many hundreds of people knew what was going on.  For me I just did not realize how sophisticated he was, damn near as good as the F.B.I. it turns out.   And he was loved by most (not all) of his clients…but he was ruthless, and in the end that along with a big dose of arrogance brought him down.  Guess what, all of us in the investigative community and the legal one are damn lucky he was…Anthony made me miserable a few times.  Will this be the end of these shenanigans? no way, there are others already “playing,” except now it is a much tougher “sell” for those who have the resources, but as it has been said, Americans have short memories… and “what was that noise?” will be asked again and again in the months and years to follow Anthony’s sentencing on December 15, 2008…”Anthony got results.”

John J. Nazarian and Family wish you all a Joyous Christmas and Happy New Year!

 sent from a reader with the right attitude:

 

‘Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater. 

If you give her sperm, she’ll give you a baby. 

If you give her a house, she’ll give you a home. 

If you give her groceries, she’ll give you a meal. 

If you give her a smile, she’ll give you her heart. 

She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her.  

So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit.’

Typhoid Mary and Anthony Pellicano, can it get any more serious than that? Well it is reported that Fiorentino is writing a screenplay about Anthony Pellicano…hmm, all I can say is that you are a little late, “Miss Thing.”  Linda, you may want to go on the speaking circuit, you know, go to police and federal training academies and tell them how you single-handedly brought one of their own…DOWN!  There could also be a sequel, “THUD”, how I dropped my F.B.I. boyfriend!  Ol’ hot cakes, aka X-Special Agent Rossini, has plead guilty and taken a deal.  Here folks is a smart one! Da Sarge should have read the same book he did as to “How to Make a Deal.”  He has already lost his career, and will get probation and a fine…the embarrassment for Mr. Rossini will be like a death sentence and again kids, FOR WHAT?  Going against his own agency to come to the defense of Anthony Pellicano?  The defense of Anthony Pellicano…as futile as rearranging the deck chairs on the S.S. Titanic! Defense? What defense was worth a Special Agent’s career?

Everyone is wanting to jump on this Pellicano bandwagon. John Connolly was one of the first, Big Dan Moldea is out there, one of the Pelican’s good friends,  Michael Viner (formerly of Dove Books).  I am surprised that Dominic Dunne has not shown up…hmmm,  perhaps he was having difficulty finding the door knob to get out of the room he was in. And here comes Fiorentino limping into the picture. And for the  victims, you betcha, that bandwagon could turn into a cash cow! But we also have several opportunists, and I am not talking about the lawyers who are trying to cash in for themselves and their clients.  When the “‘tire hits the road,” it will be all about the money! And to hell with the wreckage of police careers, the shattered lives of a few.  And then there is the Big Pay Off, the big fish for keeping your mouth shut — that is the pay off I want to hear about.  Come on, it has to be here someplace, if you find it or know about it, don’t call John Connolly, call me!

What do you get when you badger and badger and whine to whoever will listen and document and hire lawyers and whine, try and become a celebrity and whine and tell the world of your plight and yes, WHINE!  What you get is Fred Goldman.

Well after all of these years of following OJ Simpson around for the cold-blooded killing of his son, Fred can now rest. “The Killer” is in jail.  Oh, for sure it was not Fred’s whining about it that did the king of arrogance in, though maybe the Goldmans’ financial pressure on OJ over the years eventually did squeeze the big stupid out of him.  No, what got OJ was the crook, the thug, the all so greedy one, Mr. Simpson himself.  OJ had it made in Florida, but living very comfortably and playing golf every day for the rest of his life wasn’t enough.  When I worked in law enforcement I would tell all of the “knuckleheads” to stay out of San Mateo, Burbank, Glendale and I may have forgot, NEVADA.  They are not going to allow any “thuggery” to occur in that great state, and if you think you can jump on Southwest to Vegas and commit crimes…”they be waiting for you.”  Guns? Oh no they didn’t.  All of this was very predictable and finally gave to Fred Goldman something he so badly wanted, REVENGE (Goldman and Co. also want cash but for now they will have to enjoy revenge).  33 years said the lady in black robes…he probably would not have gotten that much for killing Nicole and what’s his name…we in the big city have to be careful to not upset the masses.

This is all very relevant to desperateexes.com: a woman who knows that she is not safe and then is murdered, butchered on the steps on her home by none other than her former husband.  This happens all of the time, but this had a twist, did it not?  That being the killer was arrested and then a “jury of his peers”  said “hahahaha, let him go.”  Sure this was a terrible mistake.  However, along with the whining and the noise-making from Fred Goldman and Company there was an equalizer here: screw-ups will always be screw-ups, and did I forget that “birds of a feather flock together?”  How many years did  he get?  All good things come to those who wait.  Sleep well Mr. Simpson, and sweet dreams…

Was that an earthquake that hit Washington, D.C.? Hell no,  that was just my former hero J. Edgar Hoover spinning in his grave.   The Washington Post reports that a seasoned veteran of the F.B.I. has been indicted for slipping anchovies to The Pelican in the form of dirt illegally accessed from FBI computers (see the full charges here).  A dishonest F.B.I. Agent?!  No, you say! Oh, but true.  The One Man Plague to law enforcement careers hit again, none other than “Tony Pee,” aka Anthony Pellicano.  If this story does not act as a lesson to people in law enforcement to step back and think before ever working with or for a private investigator, I don’t know what will.  One former cop now stocks the shelves of a grocery store with bread, one will be looking at  SIXTEEN YEARS (16) in a federal prison being locked up as an inmate, and now disgraced and soon to be former F.B.I. agent Mark T. Rossini has just heaved himself onto the same sandbar!

What was on Special Agent Rossini’s mind to get involved in such a silly plot?  Did he think that he could topple Special Agent Stan Ornellas? What was going to be his big payday?  A weekend in Vegas for himself and that wingnut actress girlfriend of his, Linda Fiorentino?  Pellicano we know as the “Ultimate Goombah,” Fiorentino sounds a little like a dish you might find in a cheap Italian eatery, and Rossini…holy shit, we may have just uncovered the real “Italian Connection.”   I can see it all now, three Goombahs sitting and spinning pasta on a spoon and plotting.  But plotting what, who will go to jail first? It is so true that when you throw cops, money, P.I.s and one or two crazy bitches into the mix, it is going to blow up in someone’s face……this I can speak from personal experience many years ago.

Well, I hope that my hero has not spun his panties into a knot as he lays and spins in his grave.  We all have to admit one thing: without J. Edgar Hoover the F.B.I. will never be the same…

It was also reported that Linda Fiorentino was afraid of a double cross on the part of Marty Singer.  Marty Singer, the Bentley of Entertainment Lawyers!  Marty Singer, the lawyer who makes other lawyers cringe when they receive his famous letters?  Folks, I have spoken to Mr. Singer when I worked on a very high profile case involving one of his clients, and his reputation is not one you want to mess with. He is the very best your money will buy in this town and country, there is not another entertainment lawyer who can take this guy on. Even when he is laying in bed and in need of a pot of chicken soup, you do not want to antagonize this guy.  You don’t get to be where Marty Singer is in this world by engaging in any tom foolery.  When Ms. Fiorentino began making those comments she should have been taken immediately to a treatment facility or a nice long vacation in a nice warm place.

Sneak Peek:  The plot here folks was to attack the credibility of Special Agent Stan Ornellas, who had an incredible and dedicated career at the FBI, and is now retired and looking great!   I was there when Stan the Man testified and guess what, he never stuttered and stayed the course, full-speed ahead!  Oh, by the way….if you ever see this guy moving towards you, you would be well-advised to step aside…just trust me on this one.

There will be much more on this to come and it will be all done my way!

I learned late yesterday afternoon, November 28, 2008 that my friend of many years had died that morning at 0430 hrs, at the age of 65.   Paul’s wife Jane called me and told of my friend’s passing. Paul was my go to guy for any kind of handwriting issues; he was one of this country’s foremost experts in handwriting forensics.  He was the real deal and I am honored that he allowed me to call him a friend.  The laughs we had were also very real — as soft spoken as Paul was, he still had a cop’s sense of humor.

One of the first names I heard when I met Paul many years ago was Jane; please believe me when I tell you that Paul and Jane were on an eternal honeymoon.  I was always so impressed that when you spoke to one or the other it was if you were speaking to them both.

Paul and I met when I was on an assignment and needed some real help…Beverly Hills Police was where I went and Paul was the guy I spoke to.   I asked and Paul came to the rescue and due to his hard work, a couple of people got their money back after a “flim-flam” makeup artist had ripped them off in a Ponzi scheme.  I cannot tell you how hurt I am that I will never again hear the soft-spoken Paul tell me not to worry, that he can figure it out, he always had the answer.  We did a pilot for COURT TV that I had Paul and another friend, Bobby Jakucs, on to help with an investigation…Paul was great and even in that short taping Paul was just being himself, a true legend from the ranks of law enforcement and as entertaining as they come.  When Paul told you “this is what happened,” that was the gospel!

Paul Edholm retired from the Beverly Hills Police Department in 2000 after a 30 year career.  I was with Paul while he was a cop, I was at is retirement dinner in 2000 and I will be at his memorial service in 2008.  Paul, thank you so much for being a friend and a confidante.

John

Well, one shoe fell this morning in Federal Court in Los Angeles: Terry Christensen was sentenced.  No surprises here folks, Judge Dale Fischer aka Judge Sledge (as in hammer) started slow and built to a smack down that was no surprise, 3 years in prison and a $250,000 fine. So much for paying those idiots who suggested to the court 10 months house arrest and $30,000 fine! I also noticed it got hotter as she spoke, as if the bowels of hell were opening (and this is just a warm up for the Pelican and his crew..not looking too good Paisano!). This morning’s proceedings had all the feelings of a funeral, those of us in attendance got to witness a man’s career being thrown into a pit and dirt being shoveled in on top, and the final shovel would be the sentence given by Judge Fischer.  I was not happy as I have been playing the P.I. Game in this town for many years and I as well as many others know the truth….I have said this before, if J. Edgar Hoover had been alive Mr. Christensen would have had a lot of company sitting with him…and the others had been doing what Mr. Christensen has been charged with (2 counts) for years! YEARS, not several weeks, like he did! And I know that it made no difference, steal a roll of dimes from a bank or a bag full of Benjamins it is all a crime, I do get it.  Do you get me and my point? Alright, Ok, I have heard the tapes and yes there is obviously material there to come to the conclusion that the jury and many others have come to. However, I do know all the players in High Stakes divorce cases in this town and even Higher Stakes civil litigation. And there are several lawyers in this “play pen” that must have just been taking massive doses of Immodium AD people.  Oh sure,  much of what Anthony Pellicano recorded is gone or cannot be opened by our government in Quantico, Va.  Can you imagine if the Feds had got it right the first time?

Mr. Christensen was there with his wife and his son Christopher, and many more supporters than detractors.  The defense knew exactly what was coming and went through the motions.  I have heard all the thoughts as to the defense I was there and I don’t think a better defense could have been made.  Those GD tapes, that was the burn, and again for what? At the end of the day what did Pellicano make better?  Save a few million for a rich old guy? For someone who was and still is worth billions? Saunders and Lally and several of the agents involved were also there.  Saunders too was on top of his game, this for the prosecutors is a glorious day and that is what we, as tax payer, pay them as prosecutors to do, prosecute,  and that is what these two Federal Prosecutors did, they have no reason to feel guilty. Lally, Suanders, all of the agents did a great job, I just wish that they would have dug a little deeper…what they got was a minnow, all the real big ‘uns got away.

One of the highlights of the morning was when Judge Fischer asked if any of the “victims” wanted to speak.  Well, just as there is morning and night to follow here comes none other than Stephen Kolodny. There are some things Kolodny is  not going to miss, breakfast, lunch, dinner and the opportunity to make his presence known, I think that he  loves the sound of his voice.  Stephen was sitting in the front of myself, my 2 sons and one reporter, and as he rose to his feet I noticed that it got a little darker in our section…the light came back as he moved towards the lectern.  Mr. Kolodny made a few comments, nothing new just the usual babble of how terrible this was and how bad that is and that and that and this and thank god he sat back down and those of us in the back could see the judge again!

Also present was Mr. Kerkorian’s security person, a nice guy and he always dresses very well, no surprise there, right. The shaved head, nice suit, nice glasses and a “look.”  He and I could have been separated at birth! (Kerkorian and all that is related to his name was a big part of this case). Well, when Stephen got up to address the court, the look that Kerkorian’s guy gave  Stephen was right out of the book of “if looks could kill,” or was it more of a look of “enough already”…I am thinking more like a scowl!   That moment was worth being there for.  And as I was outside taking notes, I thought I heard Mr. Kolodny make a comment to a group that “Nazarian was taking notes,” you betcha! But it is not the notes, it is what I have stored in my memory,  you know, a little here and a tidbit there.  No I don’t keep records and would never record one of my lawyers, but I do have a very selective memory and I hope enough class to never kick a guy when he is on his knees!  And to some degree that is what we all witnessed in court this morning, Mr. Christensen on his knees and Mr. Kolodney’s need to tap the nails one more time on the coffin…for old times’ sake!

The judge even made comments that for all of those waiting to make a buck off the back of Mr. Christensen, they would have what they needed in the guilty verdict.  Oh, but do not run to the bank yet to cash those checks, there is an appeal pending…I am not going to predict the outcome, I may have lost my touch for predicting. And not having a formal legal education, can an attorney represent a client and also represent that client’s former attorney? Hmmmm sounds a little complicated, but again that is just me wondering out loud!  I would also advise anyone preparing for that ‘Big Payday to be ready for Ms. Glaser, this is not a lawyer who will “cut and run.”  Those battles would  be worth the price of admission…as we used to say in bootcamp, “you better post guards and pack a lunch!”

Note: I was recently in contact with a very very very very very rich woman who did not have both oars in the water, Miss Thing’s elevator was not going to the top floor,  Sweetie was  two sandwiches short of a picnic and last but not least the lights were on but no one was  home! She and I chit-chatted and discussed a few issues concerning her also very very very very very rich, soon to be X.  Her sense of entitlement was nothing short of disgusting and I told her that I thought her better off to rethink her silly request. Her initial response: “I will have one of my security men do it”…you go girl (he, if caught could kiss that police retirement good bye)!  Needless to say she did what very very very very very rich women do with a f’d sense of entitlement.  You, see there will always be those who expect the world to dance to their tune and have the money to bribe the bandleader…the rich and the powerful want their pound of flesh, and they always find a way to get it.  That’s how this whole merry cast of characters found themselves in this situation.  Oh I did so call this one…..and again for what?

  Time flies faster the older I get .  I was very fortunate to be invited to Chickie Levanthal’s annual dinner that Chickie and her family throw to thank all of those who use her bail agency!  Well let me say this, as far as Nazarian and Associates is concerned there is only one bail agency and that is Chickie and her family.  Chickie’s Bail Bonds is the official agency for Desperateexes.com  and Nazarian and Associates. When it comes to bail agencies there is not one that has the class and compassion that this agency displays, they are the best. No request is ever refused if it is possible and when you hear they aim to please…they are serious.

Each year she throws a dinner at Melisse Restuarant in Santa Monica, this is one of the top restaurants in the United States and each year Chickie and her gang have a different theme.  This year it was Hawaiian and like all the others, the very best drink, the very best food and the service is as expected, just lovely!  Here is a picture of me and the brains of the operation, Chickie herself and her wonderful companion, Dr. Bob (Chickie looks and sounds a little like Mitzy Gaynor).

Not to be outdone by the great food my dinner guest was Kevin Mitnick, the worlds most famous computer hacker. He was a huge news story back in the day and now he travels the world telling companies and businesses how to protect themselves. While he was already in custody of the BOP they  locked this guy up as being a threat to national security…look at this guy, national security.   One of the funniest guys I have had the opportunity to meet in years!  You can visit Kevin’s website:  www.mitnicksecurity.com

Earlier today I was talking to my friend Bonny Stern; she thought that it would be nice to visit Vitello’s Italian Restaurant, which caught me by surprise as she is someone who loves good restaurants…maybe things have changed for the better?   I drove into the parking lot this evening to have dinner with the star of an upcoming new series on CBS and my son.  Now this parking lot is attached to this so-called “Studio City’s Favorite,” and the last time I was here you could park for free…well these kings of milking you of every dime found a new way to dig even deeper into your wallet, now you get to pay for parking.  Then HoseA and HoseB put up a fight about letting me park myself.  Well,  I am not cheap but no one parks my Bentley, no one.  Most smart establishments don’t want the liability of parking one of these autos (Huh, this place is not smart).  The yellow carpet service does not stop in the parking lot, it continues inside…you know the rule, dirty restrooms = often dirty restaurant and shitty attitude in the parking lot or at the door will carry on inside also, NEVER FAILS! Well I go in and ask to speak to the manager and tell him of my encounter with these two idiots in their parking lot and he tells me, “they don’t work for us anyways.” Note: If you park in this lot and something happens get ready to be told that it is not their problem.  And as for the entertainment in this place it is as good as the food…STINKS.  Opera night is a little like visiting a slaughter house, the noise that both of these places generate are very similar and you know what? They both stink.    Folks, this place is the classic example of a couple of owners just getting every nickle, dime, and whatever they can from us, the victims of this so-called Italian eatery.  The only thing that this place is known for it is where Robert Blake  took his soon to be DEAD WIFE for dinner before someone shot her in the head!  Hmm, could it have been after having a plate of this dive’s greasy food that she shot herself in the head for being so stupid for even eating here?  Well, after getting the yellow carpet treatment we are not so stupid, we leave.

Sooooo, we go over to Caioti Pizza Cafe, 4346 Tujunga Ave, Studio City, Ca.  It is across from the carnival lit signage dump called Vitello’s.  We were greeted promptly and you got the feeling that they really wanted you to come in and eat. And eat we did, the spinach salad was the best, we had three different pizzas and that too was even better.  The place was clean and well-lit (Vitello’s is dark and dank, bring a flash light and ear plugs).  And the service was great!  Our garlic nuggets came late to our table, that was the only glitch…because you can’t get to them fast enough, they were sooooo delish, warm, fresh and full of garlicky flavor.  Also they have several brands of sodas all in bottles, just like the places I had eaten when I was a kid (many made with real cane sugar).  We were so stuffed we took our freshly made  strawberry cheesecake with us, Big Yum!  Friends, do yourself a favor and skip Vitello’s and go to a place where fresh and friendly is the rule of thumb. Caioti has been around for 14 years…I am telling you to visit once and you will see why.

Vitello’s? Visit once and try and figure out how they have lasted and why are you sitting in this dump on Toojoonga.

Will Pellicano and Crew ever be sentenced?  This is becoming a little like a bad meal that keeps giving hours after eating it!  Or one of those horror flicks that the villain after getting hit with bombs, being blown to pieces and being finely chopped in a blender keeps returning.  Yup, “The King of Omerta” is not done yet, he wants lawyers to review this segment of the game he has long lost! NOW he wants a lawyer?!? Sentencing postponed again.

What is nice about this new date — December 15, 2008 at 1:30 P.M. in courtroom 840 — is that it will be the Pelicano and Crew show, making it all the more entertaining.  I can hear it all now like a boxing match:  And sitting in this corner wearing a stupid look on his face is “Little Abner” Nicherie!  And in this corner,  “Happy Ray” Turner, aka throw-your-friends-in-the-phone-company-under-the-bus! And he is still grinning!  Ladies and Gentleman, let’s hear it for the “Geek,”  yes, he is walking in with his fuzzy slippers in one hand and a picture of mommy in the other — be careful, he is very very smart, but is he smart enough for this opponent?  A group of big muscular dudes come in lip-synching to “F— the Poe-Lice,” and who should enter but “Da Sarge” Arneson.  Then all of a sudden there is a flurry of chicken shit being thrown…should this not be Pelican poop?  And then the Main  Event:  Anthony Pelicano, “The Ultimate Goombah” and superhero of an upcoming comic book, “Take this Omerta and Stuff It” (sequel to ‘”Stuffing the Bird,” coming to a correctional institution near you!).

Note: It is possible that Kachikian will not be sentenced on that day…we will see what happens to lame f&%*s who destroy evidence.

   Well the time has come and the event has passed, November 1, 2008 the 233rd Marine Corps Ball was a great success!  This was the 3rd ANGLICO event and I have to tell you all something. If ever you have any question as to the calibre of the brave men and women who protect this great nation, just attend a function like this!  A room full of very brave men and women and dozens of heros, I could not help notice the Purple Hearts, the Navy Crosses and medals and ribbons beyond belief.

My host Lt. Col. Mark Stainbrook  introduced me to Corporal Jackson, pictured above.  Corporal Jackson was a victim of a sniper, shot in the head with the bullet passing through his kevlar helmet, traveling along the skull and exiting to the rear.  His story is why all of us should buy these people a drink or pay for a meal if and when you see them at the airport or out on the town in uniform (unlike when I served, you don’t see our military out in uniform unless at work or enroute to a new duty station or going home for the holidays).  Bottom line he survived and at the ripe old age of 23 is an American War Hero, one of thousands,  first and foremost he is and always will a United States Marine!

I cannot thank the following people enough for their generosity, Sorrell Trope of Trope and Trope,  Robert M. Cohen, Law Offices of Robert M. Cohen,  Roslyn Soudry, Law Offices of Roslyn Soudry,  Lisa Helfend Meyer, Meyer, Olsen & Lowy LLP, Cary Stanchfield, Para Legal and Personal Assistant to Ms. Meyer,    Cary W. Goldstein, Law Offices of Cary W. Goldstein,  Jeffery Sklan, Law Offices of Jeffrey Sklan, and Joe Mannis, Hersh, Mannis & Bogen LLP.

Here is a picture of myself with the Lt. Colonel Greg Hallinan, Commanding Officer of 3rd ANGLICO and Lt. Col. Mark Stainbrook.  Nazarian and Associates  is looking towards another great year in its ongoing efforts to support our U.S.Marines and their families!

Thank you all again,

John

keep looking »